Well after two Esophageal dilation procedures I’m back to struggling to eat and take meds. Yesterday I found out my Viral load is rebounding and my CD4 is dropping and I’m back in the AIDS classification. I came home from the appointment and just screamed at the meds and at myself in the mirror. I’m trapped in the ring for a fight I’ll never win. These years are getting more and more difficult. I tried to be a good advocate but I can’t even take care of myself. I want to be on the injectables but I need to be undetectable before that’s an option.